What's The Worst Thing You've Done/seen/had Done To You On A Stagger?

[The Boofon]

@@reekie_dock Cardiff.

 

Technically not a stagger but a lads birthday weekend counts I reckon.

[reekie_dock]

Aye after blasting far too much Peru you took a fit and needed to be strapped down and given an adrenaline shot. Did the lads nae have to follow you to hospital oot there nut ?

 

Iv had so many close shaves I wouldn't know where to start.

 

When your best story is about a time out in Wick then you need to have a serious chat about what you did with your life...

[HairyPie]

What if you were on a get smashed in every town in the UK bender, doing it alphabetically and landed up tied to a bed by black hookers in Wick?

[Chewie37]

I'm fucked already

[HairyPie]

The Rugby variety?

Whatever floats yer boat 'pipes.

[The Buzzard]

I'm fucked already

Where is your stag taking place?

[HairyPie]

A man had to be rescued from deep water on my stagger. He was pushed off a boat in jest, the pushee not being aware the chap couldn't swim. He is black, the signs were there. Not many of our tanned brethren are capable swimmers.

[RAZOR]

Apart from the obvious, stat arse answer; Colour...

 

What's the difference between a red light and blue light district?

Red = Female

Blue = Not female

[alscotoz]

I have a story so insane and crazy. None of you could beat it. Honestly it was unreal.

 

 

I'd tell you more but it's completely made up and I'm full of shit.

 

I liked that.

[spamspamspam]

Apart from the obvious, stat arse answer; Colour...

 

What's the difference between a red light and blue light district?

 

 

One is for blokes to shag Romanian birds, the other you'd like.

[E-P-K]

paintballing, go-carting and activities in general should be the very worst things to do on a stagger.

[HairyPie]

I got "banned" from a go-karting venue when on a stagger. I tried to explain to the radge that a ban meant fuck-all as it was the first and only time I had ever been to a go-karting place and had no intention of ever going back. He was offended. Think he liked go-karts.

[RAZOR]

I got "banned" from a go-karting venue when on a stagger. I tried to explain to the radge that a ban meant fuck-all as it was the first and only time I had ever been to a go-karting place and had no intention of ever going back. He was offended. Think he liked go-karts.

Banned from the jed skis in Benidorm because I called the boy a Pagan. Cunt.

[1903Fitba]

Banned from the jed skis in Benidorm because I called the boy a Pagan. Cunt.

Another one to add to the book of insults.

 

Serpent and Pagan Cunt.

 

Lovely use of language.

[Chewie37]

Where is your stag taking place?

In Edinburgh, I'm recovering now......barely

[The Buzzard]

In Edinburgh, I'm recovering now......barely

Any good establishments along the way?

[Chewie37]

It was very sensible......

[The Buzzard]

It was very sensible......

Sure...

[mcdougall(4)]

I wouldn't fancy meeting Big Omar in a dark alley on a night out.

 

Omar had a code

[reekie_dock]

 

Omar had a code

Aye the code was large Puerto Rican dick

[Poodler]

Didn't want to start a new thread...

 

Has anyone crashed a wedding before?

 

Any tips?

[E-P-K]

There was actually an uninvited MILF arrived at my wedding dance last Saturday.

 

During the week, having a mini-honeymoon in London, after dinner we were looking for a decent bar, one bar in particular was very busy, inside and out with decent music pumping.

Went to bar and recieved a couple of drinks and tried to pay for them, but the barmaid gave me back my card, I thought the card reader was fucked.

Happened a 2nd and also a 3rd time. Then the host to the private party noticed us and quickly got the bouncers to escort us from the venue much to my wifes utter embarrassment.

Guess the bouncers were on a break or lining up when we arrived.

[Bluto10]

^^^^exact same thing happened to me last year EPK. Went into Tesco, up to the till with a few items, card wouldn't scan. Luckily I had the £8.00 or so for the goods or Id have had to have go back later on.

 

I laugh about it now.

 

[pwtredz]

My mates Dad chipped in (along with all of us) to get him sucked off from a lady boy in the blue light district in Dam.

is ur mate balding with a fair set o gnashers ?

[Arabian Knight]

Nae a stagger but the worst hing ehv seen wis at meh grannies 80th many year ago at a hotel oan the fife coast. Me brother wis shaggin meh grannies cousin oan the stair in the lobby, baith pyshed, he'd stripped doon tae just hes shirt n soacks, the staff grabbed him n frogmarched him through the function suite where every cunt wis sittin bevvyin, as if seein the cunts erect penis wisnae bad enuff he'd sterted spunkin en route. Meh faither hud never been mair ashimed. Eh says tae him many year later Eh bet eez japs eye wis still weepin when the cunt hit the pavement efter thi booted him oot.

[Guest milne_afc]

Hahahaha

 

Does your brother have Internet access AK?

[Arabian Knight]

Internet? Ees nae even goat a roof ower eez heid.

[Red_Rocket_1983]

Nae a stagger but the worst hing ehv seen wis at meh grannies 80th many year ago at a hotel oan the fife coast. Me brother wis shaggin meh grannies cousin oan the stair in the lobby, baith pyshed, he'd stripped doon tae just hes shirt n soacks, the staff grabbed him n frogmarched him through the function suite where every cunt wis sittin bevvyin, as if seein the cunts erect penis wisnae bad enuff he'd sterted spunkin en route. Meh faither hud never been mair ashimed. Eh says tae him many year later Eh bet eez japs eye wis still weepin when the cunt hit the pavement efter thi booted him oot.

 

AK for best poster award!

[Poodler]

Nae a stagger but the worst hing ehv seen wis at meh grannies 80th many year ago at a hotel oan the fife coast. Me brother wis shaggin meh grannies cousin oan the stair in the lobby, baith pyshed, he'd stripped doon tae just hes shirt n soacks, the staff grabbed him n frogmarched him through the function suite where every cunt wis sittin bevvyin, as if seein the cunts erect penis wisnae bad enuff he'd sterted spunkin en route. Meh faither hud never been mair ashimed. Eh says tae him many year later Eh bet eez japs eye wis still weepin when the cunt hit the pavement efter thi booted him oot.

Hahaha

[Guest milne_afc]

as if seein the cunts erect penis wisnae bad enuff he'd sterted spunkin en route

 

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