Which Celebrity Will Die Next ?

[tutankamun]

23 minutes ago, Parklife said:

You saw his death certificate? What does it say? 

Not yet but my point is, it’s not up to the family, it is (or will be) public knowledge.

8 minutes ago, Ten Caat said:

Unless he was seen by a doctor in the month before his death, a post-mortem would be carried out routinely as he was a sudden, unexpected death.

Even if he had been seen by a doctor in that previous month, the likelihood is his family would still be asked to grant permission for a post-mortem given his age.

I doubt his certificate says "natural causes"...it will have an actual cause of death on it (I'd suspect myocardial infarction or cardiac arrest)

“A spokeswoman for Dorset Coroner's Office said: 'We confirm that Mr Cattermole died from natural causes and our investigations have concluded. As his death was from natural causes there will be no inquest.’”

[Parklife]

Just now, tutankamun said:

Not yet

Yeah. Thought as much. 

Maybe actually go do that before spouting your mentalist pish. 

[Ten Caat]

1 minute ago, tutankamun said:

Not yet but my point is, it’s not up to the family, it is (or will be) public knowledge.

“A spokeswoman for Dorset Coroner's Office said: 'We confirm that Mr Cattermole died from natural causes and our investigations have concluded. As his death was from natural causes there will be no inquest.’”

A post-mortem isn't an inquest.....

[tutankamun]

7 minutes ago, Ten Caat said:

A post-mortem isn't an inquest.....

Yet they’ve already concluded he died of natural causes. Can they conclude anything until after the post-mortem?

[Parklife]

9 minutes ago, tutankamun said:

Yet they’ve already concluded he died of natural causes. Can they conclude anything until after the post-mortem?

You have. With a whole host of people who die actually. 

[Ten Caat]

1 minute ago, tutankamun said:

Yet they’ve already concluded he died of natural causes. Can they conclude anything until after the post-mortem?

The post-mortem would take place within a few days of his death. In most instances, a definitive cause will be identified. The results get passed to the coroner's office and as there was nothing suspicious found, no inquiry will be carried out. (had it been discovered it had been suicide for example, that would progress to an inquiry)

It's up to his family if they want to publish that exact cause. But the coroner's office, as it hasn't progressed to an official inquiry, won't give out those precise details. They'll just say "natural causes"....it's a catch-all phrase which gives nothing away and covers anything from heart attacks to stroke or cancers or kidney/liver disease.

[dazzy_deff]

FFS @tutankamunlet it lie min. You've just shown you don't have a clue what you are talking about.

[Redforever86]

11 minutes ago, dazzy_deff said:

FFS @tutankamunlet it lie min. You've just shown you don't have a clue what you are talking about.

Don’t listen to him Tuts. Get down to Dorset and solve this mystery then off over to the states for Tina too.

[chief_wiggum]

Were going to need a bigger tin foil hat!

[tutankamun]

18 minutes ago, dazzy_deff said:

FFS @tutankamunlet it lie min. You've just shown you don't have a clue what you are talking about.

Aye nothing to see here. Move along.

[Fridge]

Death by misadventure is the only way to go. Nae even sure what that means but I always assume some sort of cocktail of drugs and alcohol are involved. 

[Redforever86]

7 minutes ago, tutankamun said:

Aye nothing to see here. Move along.

Go investigate, if you don’t do it no one will.

[chief_wiggum]

2 minutes ago, Redforever86 said:

Go investigate, if you don’t do it no one will.

Not sure which one he needs ?

or

[Fridge]

1 hour ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Doing a zip wire with your cock instead of your hands. 

Nae sure that would cause death

[Ten Caat]

1 minute ago, Fridge said:

Nae sure that would cause death

The person doing it would be praying for death to come quickly by the time he had reached the bottom

[Parklife]

5 minutes ago, Fridge said:

Nae sure that would cause death

Cock would rip off and you'd hurtle to earth. 

Deid and cockless. 

[Fridge]

12 minutes ago, Parklife said:

Cock would rip off and you'd hurtle to earth. 

Deid and cockless. 

Definitely one to be told at Christmas dinner while folk are reminiscing about you.

[Dom Sullivan]

3 hours ago, Parklife said:

Cock would rip off and you'd hurtle to earth. 

Deid and cockless. 

Would give a whole new meaning to ripping the heid aff it and feeling the earth move

[The Buzzard]

5 hours ago, Ten Caat said:

The post-mortem would take place within a few days of his death. In most instances, a definitive cause will be identified. The results get passed to the coroner's office and as there was nothing suspicious found, no inquiry will be carried out. (had it been discovered it had been suicide for example, that would progress to an inquiry)

It's up to his family if they want to publish that exact cause. But the coroner's office, as it hasn't progressed to an official inquiry, won't give out those precise details. They'll just say "natural causes"....it's a catch-all phrase which gives nothing away and covers anything from heart attacks to stroke or cancers or kidney/liver disease.

Someone I know passed away recently, TC, suddenly and unexpectedly. The PM came back as unascertained. Is that a common conclusion these days?

[The Buzzard]

21 minutes ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Were they on a zipwire?

Negative. No cock to traverse down it with. 

[Ten Caat]

1 hour ago, The Buzzard said:

Someone I know passed away recently, TC, suddenly and unexpectedly. The PM came back as unascertained. Is that a common conclusion these days?

Highly unusual on post-mortem to for the pathologist to be unable to establish a cause of death.

There is a "diagnosis" which fits this and has been used in the past 20 years or so which is Sudden Arrythmic Death Syndrome. Essentially the poor sod has suffered a cardiac arrest but the pathologist cannot establish why (usually in folks with cardiac arrest, the cause will have been a heart attack or coronary artery disease which are both easily found on pm). The theory behind SADS is that there has been a disturbance to the electrical signals to the heart's own natural pacemaker but this doesn't show up on pm (it might have shown up if the patient had been on an ECG prior to it happening but SADS generally occurs in what you would think are healthy youngish adults who are walking around and just drop down dead or go to sleep at night and are found dead next morning)

 

[The Buzzard]

1 hour ago, Ten Caat said:

Highly unusual on post-mortem to for the pathologist to be unable to establish a cause of death.

There is a "diagnosis" which fits this and has been used in the past 20 years or so which is Sudden Arrythmic Death Syndrome. Essentially the poor sod has suffered a cardiac arrest but the pathologist cannot establish why (usually in folks with cardiac arrest, the cause will have been a heart attack or coronary artery disease which are both easily found on pm). The theory behind SADS is that there has been a disturbance to the electrical signals to the heart's own natural pacemaker but this doesn't show up on pm (it might have shown up if the patient had been on an ECG prior to it happening but SADS generally occurs in what you would think are healthy youngish adults who are walking around and just drop down dead or go to sleep at night and are found dead next morning)

 

Pretty much how it was. Went to bed, her husband got up during the night for a piss, got back into bed and realised she was stone cold. Only 49. Not the fittest but at the same time, no obvious reason for it occurring. No idea on vaccine status before tuts or anyone might ask. 

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

18 hours ago, tutankamun said:

So we just take our pick of what we think killed her? Decide for ourselves?

Paul Cattermole from S Club 7 died (suddenly) of natural causes  at the ripe old age of 46 recently. No other info given.

Died as a result of a tackle committed by his footballer cousin Lee.

[tutankamun]

Not looking good for Celine Dion.

Too many of the wrong jib-jabs or did they cut off her adrenochrome supply?

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-65725250

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

18 minutes ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Cattermole pigeons

No pain in his chest, oooooowoe........

[tutankamun]

The results are in… and it’s no surprise. Move along.

“Paul's death certificate - seen by People- lists cardiac arrhythmia, acute myocardial ischemia and severe coronary artery atheroma and intraplaque hemorrhage as the causes of death.”

https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/22563591/s-club-7-paul-cattermole-cause-death-heart/amp/

[Parklife]

6 hours ago, tutankamun said:

The results are in… and it’s no surprise. Move along.

“Paul's death certificate - seen by People- lists cardiac arrhythmia, acute myocardial ischemia and severe coronary artery atheroma and intraplaque hemorrhage as the causes of death.”

https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/22563591/s-club-7-paul-cattermole-cause-death-heart/amp/

mUsTvE bEeN dA vAcCiNe. nO oNe hAd hEaRt iSsUeS bEfOrE tHeN. 

[Ten Caat]

6 hours ago, tutankamun said:

The results are in… and it’s no surprise. Move along.

“Paul's death certificate - seen by People- lists cardiac arrhythmia, acute myocardial ischemia and severe coronary artery atheroma and intraplaque hemorrhage as the causes of death.”

https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/22563591/s-club-7-paul-cattermole-cause-death-heart/amp/

Atheroma is fatty deposits, built up over years (decades) which narrow the arteries....in this case the 4 coronary arteries...which in turn reduces oxygen supply to the heart. Intraplaque haemorrhage is a known feature of arteries narrowed by atheroma.

To make all this a bit more understandable for Joe Bloggs....he had a heart attack. Not unusual in fat blokes (compare the pictures of him taken a couple of days before he pegged it and those in is S Club 7 "heyday")

Fuck all to do with the covid jab

[BrianFaePerth]

37 minutes ago, Sooper-hanz said:

I had that ‘stiff person syndrome’ as a young man. Sadly not so much these days 😂

You might fix that if you were giving your missus a seeing to instead of posting shite in to the wee hours on here.

[tutankamun]

14 hours ago, Ten Caat said:

Fuck all to do with the covid jab

Whatever you say doc 👍