Favourite Things To Do On Boxing Day

[Bluto10]

Poodler. He was brand new but worth watching. Not in my league, he's a mere apprentice.

How come you met him?

You on the Mate scrounge?

[Bluto10]

I think I'm the good neighbour... I leave people the fuck alone until they need help, at which point I leap into action and do what needs to be done (with the exception of common assault) Today I'll be snow-blowing the property of Dementia Neighbour because him and his wife can't do it. I

 

But I could write a trilogy the size of the Lord of the Rings (that's a series of books fit nerds read) about the dysfunctionality of my neighbours.

 

Some are benign dysfunctional, some are less than benign dysfunctional, and presumably most of them are armed dysfunctional.

 

I've literally had Federal Officers leaping across my fucking lawn, guns drawn, as they made a bust at the home of one particular neighbour... and I live in a nice, white collar, middle class neighbourhood... so fuck knows what kind of living hell it is for people who live south of 8 Mile in the D.

 

Ghost town would be brilliant... only people you'd ever see is a carload of sexy student types who get lost on the way to Spring Break, and find themselves in the creepy old ghost town straight out of a Scooby Doo cartoon.

 

This place would be my dream purchase, but I doubt I could justify the 90 grand to the wife for an 'Abandoned Mining Town in the Mountains'.

 

I'd call it Keltville.

 

 

Looks ace.

[tup]

How come you met him?

You on the Mate scrounge?

Nope, he wanted to meet me. I was there with my pal ebbe.

[Ke1t]

Looks ace.

 

It looks beyond ace.

 

A brisk morning walk to that peak in the background... chop a tree down on the way back... maybe smash a bear in the chops for looking at you funny, the cheeky cunt. Get a wolf for a pet, and take him hunting with you. Build yourself a big fuck off cabin with a rape basement for when the Scooby Doo thing happens...

 

Only slight drawbacks... no power, no plumbing, no phone service, and probably no internet. You could literally be snowed in for weeks some winters. You would be waaay past off-the-grid and just about back to the fucking Stone Age. The nearest bar is going to be in some tiny town fifty miles along the road, where everyone is inbred related and now YOU'VE wandered into someone else's Scooby Doo scenario.

 

You could definitely fix up one of the shacks and make your own moonshine, though. Just to avoid any potential Deliverance-type situations where you've got a toothless redneck riding you bare-arsed through the trees as you make sobbing pig-noises for his arousal, praying that Burt Reynolds turns up with his bow and arrow... but he won't.

 

So that'd be another thing for the drawback column.

 

 

[mcdougall(4)]

How come you met him?

You on the Mate scrounge?

You looking for advice on how to get some

[Betty Swallicks]

I drink heavily on Boxing Day. That said I try and drink heavily from 23rd to 28th Dec then 30th Dec-3rd Jan.

 

Its a horrible time of year for anyone aged between 14 and 65 imo.

[Chewie37]

usually patching things up with the mrs either via grovelling or arse sex.

 

Nice if you to let her wear the strap on for Christmas

[The Boofon]

 

It looks beyond ace.

 

A brisk morning walk to that peak in the background... chop a tree down on the way back... maybe smash a bear in the chops for looking at you funny, the cheeky cunt. Get a wolf for a pet, and take him hunting with you. Build yourself a big fuck off cabin with a rape basement for when the Scooby Doo thing happens...

 

Only slight drawbacks... no power, no plumbing, no phone service, and probably no internet. You could literally be snowed in for weeks some winters. You would be waaay past off-the-grid and just about back to the fucking Stone Age. The nearest bar is going to be in some tiny town fifty miles along the road, where everyone is inbred related and now YOU'VE wandered into someone else's Scooby Doo scenario.

 

You could definitely fix up one of the shacks and make your own moonshine, though. Just to avoid any potential Deliverance-type situations where you've got a toothless redneck riding you bare-arsed through the trees as you make sobbing pig-noises for his arousal, praying that Burt Reynolds turns up with his bow and arrow... but he won't.

 

So that'd be another thing for the drawback column.

 

 

 

 

Not for everybody.

[rumpus]

 

It looks beyond ace.

 

A brisk morning walk to that peak in the background... chop a tree down on the way back... maybe smash a bear in the chops for looking at you funny, the cheeky cunt. Get a wolf for a pet, and take him hunting with you. Build yourself a big fuck off cabin with a rape basement for when the Scooby Doo thing happens...

 

Only slight drawbacks... no power, no plumbing, no phone service, and probably no internet. You could literally be snowed in for weeks some winters. You would be waaay past off-the-grid and just about back to the fucking Stone Age. The nearest bar is going to be in some tiny town fifty miles along the road, where everyone is inbred related and now YOU'VE wandered into someone else's Scooby Doo scenario.

 

You could definitely fix up one of the shacks and make your own moonshine, though. Just to avoid any potential Deliverance-type situations where you've got a toothless redneck riding you bare-arsed through the trees as you make sobbing pig-noises for his arousal, praying that Burt Reynolds turns up with his bow and arrow... but he won't.

 

So that'd be another thing for the drawback column.

 

 

 

 

Lost the fucking plot min.

 

More money than you know what to do with, no proper pals and an uptight muslim wife who won't breed +1.

[rumpus]

pppp

[BrianFaePerth]

pppp

Pppprrrriiiicccckkkk

[Bluto10]

For me today.

 

Lots of them.

[manboobs109]

^ strange obsession you have with Tup cavey