I Wonder Who Has The Best Job In Aberdeen? (Working Away From Home Counts)

[terenceandphilip]

people write books about jobs and industry and what have you, so that students can copy chunks into essays to pass courseworks. Its probably all a bit of a stitch up, but I'll help these authors out with a formula i devised:

 

 

the best job = the least work x the most money

 

 

 

this is the formula i would direct HR to, but my query is who has the best job?

[Huntlysheep]

I'm a welder/fabricator with my dad & brother near Huntly it's a family run company. it's a great job I don't care about the money it's a skilled trade & also it's always what I wanted to do.

[Dynamo]

I feed huns to Lions for a living in Kenya.

 

I win.

[Tommy]

I circumcise elephants. The wage is pish but the tips are huge.

[Bluto10]

I also see no point in discussing money as it's a 'how big is your cock' competition for knobends with small cocks.

 

aye, its shite dinner party chat for twats.

 

 

having it is great but its the little things in life that are best.

sitting on a terrace getting blootered; dinna need to a be a millioanire for that.

[terenceandphilip]

haha, i couldn't give a tiddling toot how much money anyone has (or me hardly)

 

it's the formula I'm interested in.

 

 

 

who does the least work? Who's on the easiest ride?

[Nelly]

I'm a welder/fabricator with my dad & brother near Huntly it's a family run company. I earn around £35,000 a year it's a great job.

 

A great wage for a young loon but you'll learn that its best to keep quiet about how much you earn. Its a bit crass and the quickest way to turn people against you.

[Bluto10]

youre semi right t&p.

like arsenal, close but not quite there.

 

it is about a balance. but its not about doing the least.

 

its a lifestyle choice to have a demanding well piad job. the coins are balanced by the stress, work load etc.

 

but the best job is the one you enjoy. and get paid for it.

if you can say you enjoy it, or at least dinna dread it, then youve found the eldorado of careers.

 

when i moved over here, and found life after driving to work i said, youve made it bluto, youve made it.

 

[terenceandphilip]

certainly wasn't trumpet time on the money stakes :-)

 

and i should have added the caveat of non self referall for incrimination purposes.

 

 

 

bluto, you 'found life after driving to work?' can you elaborate.

 

 

 

ps my money is medium and I dread it usually - i should up the stakes. Its a 4 letter word for me unfortunately. Offices are dull as hell.

[Bluto10]

T&P

 

i worked in dyce, driving every day from centre of city.

even a party animal like myself was unable to jee up the troops fopr post work beers; ahbdy drives to work, you see.

 

but take that chore out of your daily life and somehow it becomes a lot more chilled out; less pressured.

 

after work beers atre common place; too bloody common

and hangovers arent a issue when you dont drive the next day.

 

work becomes more sociable and thus enjoyable

 

[The Boofon]

people write books about jobs and industry and what have you, so that students can copy chunks into essays to pass courseworks. Its probably all a bit of a stitch up, but I'll help these authors out with a formula i devised:

 

 

the best job = the least work x the most money

 

 

 

this is the formula i would direct HR to, but my query is who has the best job?

Not me only because my least work value is zero so regardless of my wage a multiple of zero is still zero.

 

Shame as I'd have won hands down otherwise.

 

Paul Lawrie will win this. Going on the weekend golf he should be thankful of a win at something.

Only kidding Paul.

[spamspamspam]

Barney Crockett has the best job in Aberdeen.

 

Responsible for his own pay rise

Can spend 5 years saying that isnt possible without having to come up with alternative ideas

Can claim credit for the work of others

Can pass the buck to anyone he wants

Free lunches, diners, butteries, coffees, in fact he pays for nothing at work.

[The Boofon]

You don't like the council very much do you Spam?

 

You should run for councillor at the next elections.

[spamspamspam]

You don't like the council very much do you Spam?

 

You should run for councillor at the next elections.

 

It would be fair to say I cannot stand ACC, no matter who is in charge and who is calling the shots they are, in my opinion, a bunch of crooked, back hand accepting, sleazy, in it for themselves morons with less collective intelligence than a troop of baboons.

 

No point, even the independents align themselves with party politics.

[tightbreeks]

so are edinburgh city cooncil

 

a den of thieves where cronyism is rife. managed to spunk away 500 mill on the trams like it was f-all.

[Pash]

Roberto easliy does the least amount of work for the most amount of money.

[chaos_defrost]

HR Manager seems to be a cushty job. Must be highly skilled in feeding bullshit and countering any arguments with more bullshit in order to avoid tackling real issues within the workplace. Apart from that, not a lot of other skills are required. Excellent pay, 9-5 hours and gives woman a great sense of self importance.

[Ke1t]

I don't know how good my job is, but I probably manage a solid 30 minutes a day with no weekend work.

 

I do want to change my vocation, though, and have actually been commissioned to do a little side work involving writing, which would be my choice of job if I had my choice of job.

 

Paid to write pish?

 

I'd be a fucking squillionaire if I got paid to write pish.

[dervish]

I write pish, do fucking spreadsheets and have a precocious ability to consume large amounts of feces. Get paid what in Aberdeen would be considered slave wages too.

[chaos_defrost]

I've been self-employed for 20 years. My first company was engaged in recruitment consultancy for a niche market. I would work 100 hours a week in January and February but in July and August, I played golf all the time, "worked" very little, placed a few folk with a phone call here and there and still collected five figures in my hipper every month. That was the "best" in terms of money made to hours put in ratio you talk about t&p but in terms of enjoyment, it got very boring after 2 or 3 years.

 

Money means fuck all. Nice to have particularly when you've experienced hardship and have had fuck all and were worrying about how to feed your kids but I would always take job (and life) satisfaction over cold hard cash. Those tragic fucks who hate their jobs and do it only for the money, dreaming about their retirements are the saddest.

 

You must have either absolutely loved your work or that would have been absolute hell. That would be like giving up 2 months out of your year. Can't be healthy working like that.

[amancalledbuck]

I'm skint but happy.

 

Really skint, if I'm honest.

 

But really fucking happy, too.

 

It all depends on what you want out of life.

 

 

 

 

 

 

And if you're a shallow mongtard.

[chaos_defrost]

I'm skint but happy.

 

Really skint, if I'm honest.

 

But really fucking happy, too.

 

It all depends on what you want out of life.

 

 

 

 

 

 

And if you're a shallow mongtard.

 

The original theory of least work x the most money = happiness. Doubt that really works in the real world. Depends what motivates people. I'm yet to find a balance that really suits me.

 

I've lived off minimum wage and it's not enough to live off if you want to have holidays or buy things every once in a while which would be classed as luxuries. Job I've got now is the most money I've ever earned however flip side is my hours are too long and I can't do some of the things I want to do outside work. Have enjoyed every job I've ever done to varying degrees but always eventually get bored and want to find something else.

 

I reckon the happiest jobs are the ones where people aren't bored at their work, learn new things and have enough time, money and energy to have a life and do what they want outside the workplace. I reckon it's near impossible for an employee to find something perfect for them but you can do things towards getting close to it if you're motivated enough and don't get pushed about at work.

[The Boofon]

I've just spent 6 months off work on full pay with compo yet to be discussed.

 

On the down side I'm in the Al Queda top 100 wanted men.

[The Boofon]

See post 27.

[buchanskii]

I've just spent 6 months off work on full pay with compo yet to be discussed.

On the down side I'm in the Al Queda top 100 wanted men.

Are you really wanted by al qeada?

 

That would frighten the hell out of me.

[looksgoodinred]

Good attitude cd. It takes years to work out a) what we want from life, b) what the right balance is for us as individuals, and most importantly c) how to get it.

 

I've had shit jobs that pay well and shit jobs that didn't pay well but they didn't seem that shit at the time. When I eventually worked out that I can't work with people (as colleagues, bosses mostly) and could only tolerate people when they are clients who pay me, then I never had a shit job again.

 

You'll be good. People with the right attitudes always get looked after by the god karma yingy yangster mannie.

 

Explain that you devout atheists? How come cunts with good attitudes ALWAYS find happiness and those with stinking negative, self-obsessed attitudes ALWAYS run into deep misfortune?

 

Be patient chaos. You're on the right path. Sloth is a killer. Work hard and with enthusiasm and keep your eyes and ears open.

 

i found it changed as circumstances did too.

 

when you're young and just starting out, it's easy to work longer hours. and natural to want to make some cash to buy a home or travel and do things.

 

when your children are young, you probably want stability and more money. but also balanced with some time with them. you may be willing to earn less in order to have flexibility in your position, or regular time off.

 

and once they've flown the coop, you may go back to working longer hours because you can, or wanting more free time and willing to make do with less in order to pursue hobbies.

[dervish]

I've just spent 6 months off work on full pay with compo yet to be discussed.

 

On the down side I'm in the Al Queda top 100 wanted men.

 

Haha you lucky shite. That said when I used to work shifts had 3 weeks off when no other cunt did. Bored out of my head knew it was bad when I started thinking "gemstone globes" off bidup.tv were a cracking investment. Truly my lowest ebb.

[looksgoodinred]

See post 27.

 

i'm sure Tup could sort that out for you if you asked. perhaps a visit to the Corner?

[The Boofon]

Are you really wanted by al qeada?That would frighten the hell out of me.

Yes. Not frightened in the slightest. I'm a jean jogger. I can outrun the bastards.

[The Boofon]

Work life balance is the most important thing for me.Got the balance pretty much spot on, although work is changing so I've taken a risk and gone for voluntary redundancy in December.I absolutely know where I want to be professionally in 5 years time and how to go about it. Life has a habit of throwing in game changers though, so I'll do my best to take that in my stride as and when.

Get the fuck out of Glasgow is my career advice to you Bripod. It's turned you soft.