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Telly Programmes That Haven't Been Made Yet


amancalledbuck

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Poles Apartment, reality DIY show, showcasing the joinery, plumbing and building skills of a squadron of immigrants, set in Torry.

 

You could have a panel of local joiners, plumber and builders judging the workmanship.

 

Winner gets a job.

 

This is the type of thing we should be seeing on the telly.

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Don't want to take issue with you here but you may come up against product placement issues.

 

The giants have their own brands of beans - I'm led to believe, for minks and poor people obviously - and wouldn't they want to push these rather than Heinz products?

 

I like the way you think.

 

You can present the ITV2 Spin Off of the programme.

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faliraki nights- featuring David Goodwillie and Allan McGregor.

 

Most Haunted- Featuring Gary McDonald

 

Britians toughest pubs- Featuring eh..........eh......Mark Kerr

 

The Thickest Mink, a bit like the weakest link but with tims and huns.

 

The Worlds toughest Mountion Climbs- Featuring David Murray

 

Darren Mackie's Street Striker

 

A place in the Sun Featuring Jimmy Calderwood

 

Snatch of the Day, todays finist talent gets their vadges oot.

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Match of the Gay.

 

Homos, so repressed in fitba to this day that they canna admit their poofiness openly, start their own league, which is immediately given star billing by the buftie obsessed Beeb.

 

Presented by Graham Norton, with a panel of Julian Clary and Dale Winton.

 

Commentary by Peter Tatchell, summarised by Mandelson.

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Celebrity Trampoline

 

6 celebrities try to clear the streets of London of tramps using only gasoline.

 

This week Ken Morley is chased through Gunnersbury station by a woman throwing flaming cats after she wakes up unexpectedly, and Jim Davidson, ironically, is ambushed near Elephant and Castle by a gang of 1930s-esque railroad hobos.

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Richard and Goody

 

RIchard Madeley gets visitations from the ghost of Jade and is urged to go out and steal sausages and a bottle of wine all captured on CCTV and shown to the general public.

 

He gets off with it though as the Goody visitations means his memory plays tricks on him and he forgot they were there.

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