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Thread O Unsolicited Life Advice


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#61 OFFLINE   The Boofon

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 09:32 AM

Buy low sell high.
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#62 OFFLINE   Parklife

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 09:55 AM

That depends. If you go out of your way to stop to let someone in then you're an inconsiderate arsehole.

If your idling in a queue, fair enough.


You shouldn't have to "stop" to let someone in. Anticipate, slow down, flash lights. Job done.

It's nice to be nice.
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#63 OFFLINE   BrianFaePerth

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 09:57 AM

You shouldn't have to "stop" to let someone in. Anticipate, slow down, flash lights. Job done.

It's nice to be nice.


Which means the person behind you needs to anticipate you'll break the rules of the road. Arsehole.
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Byen e' Bergen, laget e' Brann

#64 OFFLINE   Betty Swallicks

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 10:05 AM

Never trust a man who doesn't like sport.


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#65 OFFLINE   YorkDon

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 10:10 AM

You shouldn't have to "stop" to let someone in. Anticipate, slow down, flash lights. Job done.

It's nice to be nice.


Unless they are a dithering cunt and you end up having to stop anyway and it pisses you off...
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#66 OFFLINE   eeps

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 10:12 AM

Would you wash your asshole before waxing or would you leave the debris as evidence to the beauty therapist quine/loon/non-gender specific individual as to why you should wax and/or wash your asshole.


A judicious trim with some garden shears should be good enough
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#67 OFFLINE   Bad_Mobby

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 10:35 AM

Never trust a man who doesn't like sport.


Never befriend a man who plays golf (or even watches it FTM)
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TPFKATGLA 


#68 OFFLINE   Parklife

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 10:45 AM

Unless they are a dithering cunt and you end up having to stop anyway and it pisses you off...


Yeah, that's annoying.
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#69 OFFLINE   Parklife

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 10:46 AM

Which means the person behind you needs to anticipate you'll break the rules of the road. Arsehole.


"Rules of the road"

LOL.

Loser.
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#70 OFFLINE   YorkDon

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 10:53 AM

Never pander to animals or children.
You have to show them you’re the parent/boss,or you’ll get walked all the fuck over like a complete bitch.
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#71 OFFLINE   cheesepipes

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 11:27 AM

Slip ons >> CAT type boots imo

boots should only be worn in deserts and jungles when your fighting a war.

 

 

you have such strict rules of conduct to justify wearing shit clothes.


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If you are not a Proper Gent, you are bent.

#72 OFFLINE   The Oxford Don

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 11:32 AM

Slip-ons are entirely acceptable for the purposes of flying. 

 

Nothing worse than being asked to take your shoes off at the security screening and having to fanny about with the laces. 


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#73 OFFLINE   Poodler

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 11:33 AM

Never trust a man who doesn't like sport.


200%
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#74 OFFLINE   cheesepipes

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 11:39 AM

Slip-ons are entirely acceptable for the purposes of flying. 

 

Nothing worse than being asked to take your shoes off at the security screening and having to fanny about with the laces. 

 

 

absolute nonsense.

 

wear trainers, you never need to take them off.

 

terrible argument from the For side.


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If you are not a Proper Gent, you are bent.

#75 OFFLINE   Poodler

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 11:39 AM

Slip-ons are entirely acceptable for the purposes of flying.

Nothing worse than being asked to take your shoes off at the security screening and having to fanny about with the laces.



Rather have to do that than watch the double leg breaker that Boof just sent me, again
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#76 OFFLINE   The Boofon

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 11:41 AM

Rather have to do that than watch the double leg breaker that Boof just sent me, again

 

 

It's a fucking beauty that.

 

Never pretend you can land like a cat would be my unsolicited advice to that particular split arse.


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#77 OFFLINE   The Boofon

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 11:45 AM

https://www.joe.co.u...ome-fall-226804

For the curiously minded viewers.
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#78 OFFLINE   YorkDon

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 11:57 AM

https://www.joe.co.u...ome-fall-226804

For the curiously minded viewers.


Reckon that will smart a touch like!
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#79 ONLINE   King Street Loon

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 12:00 PM

It's a fucking beauty that.

Never pretend you can land like a cat would be my unsolicited advice to that particular split arse.

Edit, I'm blind.

Edited by King Street Loon, 08 April 2019 - 12:01 PM.

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The Northern Lights of old Aberdeen

Mean home sweet home to me

The Northern Lights of Aberdeen

Are what I long to see

I've been a wanderer all of my life

And many a sight I've seen

God speed the day when l'm on my way

To my home in Aberdeen!!


#80 OFFLINE   Redforever86

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 12:00 PM

Brutal as fuck, aerospace my arse haha.
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#81 OFFLINE   Betty Swallicks

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 12:42 PM

https://www.joe.co.u...ome-fall-226804

For the curiously minded viewers.

 

"I think she may be hurt" says the obviously expert commentator.


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#82 OFFLINE   strachanmcgheegoal

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 12:48 PM

Just get up and run it off. Sideways and crablike obviously.
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#83 OFFLINE   Hewitt a the pies

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 02:07 PM

Never EVER slam a car door on yer sisters fingers again.


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#84 OFFLINE   Don Fonte

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 02:23 PM

Never trust a man who pisses in the cubicles when there's a urinal available.
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#85 OFFLINE   Foster14

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 02:31 PM

Never trust a man who pisses in the cubicles when there's a urinal available.

 

Agreed.  Though, what about when the only one available is one of the urinals designed for children or vertically challenged people?  Any exception there?


Edited by Foster14, 08 April 2019 - 02:32 PM.

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Ding dong, normal guy in the house!

#86 OFFLINE   Dad

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 02:34 PM

Never trust an electrician with no eyebrows.
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Dad ate my gerbil

#87 OFFLINE   Grays Babylon 1875

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 02:34 PM

Never trust a man who pisses in the cubicles when there's a urinal available.


Net et.

This motherfucker is wise. All manner of beasts in public lavvies wanting to receive some swollen goods.

Cubicle is where it's at. Door locked obviously, in case Seabass is lurking. @Poodler
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Better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war. 


#88 OFFLINE   Grays Babylon 1875

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 02:36 PM

Pineapples.

Eat fucking pineapples.

Man those motherfuckers are good.

Fresh pineapple in the morning sets a brother up for a good day.

Or sister. 🙏
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Better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war. 


#89 OFFLINE   Dad

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 02:38 PM

Often a result of 'shy cock' relying on cubicles ^

But I concur GB son - whilst the dirty urinal users are splashing drips of urine all over themselves, the floor and their lovers hair - old Dad is safely behind door, talcing, combing and aftershaving himself to victory.

Terrific

Edited by Dad, 08 April 2019 - 02:39 PM.

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Dad ate my gerbil

#90 OFFLINE   Dad

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Posted 08 April 2019 - 02:39 PM

Pineapples.
Eat fucking pineapples.
Man those motherfuckers are good.
Fresh pineapple in the morning sets a brother up for a good day.
Or sister.


On fire today son - right again.

Makes your man milk taste better too (so I hear - steady now).
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Dad ate my gerbil




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