How many people will attend your funeral?

[Poodler]

Are you ok?

[tightbreeks]

3 posts, 3D.

 

Nope, I cocked it.

[tightbreeks]

Just trying to reach out to any forward thinking John carpenters out there, or james Cameron's.

[tightbreeks]

The hat is my facebook, I have succumbed to Twitter, but I promise I'll stop with the randomness.

[fatjim]

I genuinely wonder if a devotee of another religion would get the same stick as CS on here. I doubt it tbh.

 

If they were a muslim you'd probably give them more stick.

 

To be fair though when someone uses their belief in mumbo jumbo to justify their outdated views on certain subjects then they are a fair target. He is pretty thick skinned and can take it. His belief in fairytales seems to strengthen his resolve even without any evidence supporting his beliefs. He is more than happy to pass judgement on people (despite that not really being very Christian like)

[Fridge]

The hat is my facebook, I have succumbed to Twitter, but I promise I'll stop with the randomness.

Get yourself on the by the fire with Dad thread. He’ll sort you out.

[tightbreeks]

Mk ultra, and free lsd.

[tightbreeks]

Cheers da, as they say in east lothian. Might nip over for a tete a tete.

[Don Fonte]

Cheers da, as they say in east lothian. Might nip over for a tete a tete.

Shirt lifter.

[tightbreeks]

Lift farter

[Betty Swallicks]

I want the cheapest burning possible deducted from the average cost of a burning/planting and the difference put behind the bar to show the cunts still alive how daft an expensive funeral is (and how ace I am was).

[Fridge]

Coffin carried in to We all agree the Ibrox disaster was magic if anyone turns up.

 

Folk doing lines of coke off my coffin.

 

Minister to say Fridge was a fucking ledge but let’s not waste anyone’s time messing about here, we’re all screaming for a pint and some sausage rolls.

 

Who’s that lying at Pittodrie being belted out as folk exit the crem and try to get to the bar fastest.

 

My Mum will be proud.

[Ohjimmyjimmy]

Much better to sing songs and pretend their deceased loved one’s spirit lives on in some magical place in the sky looked after by a big wizard.

[tightbreeks]

I'll be in a cardboard coffin ready for the cremation, maybe a few flowers to cover the cardboard.

[Don Fonte]

Coffin carried in to We all agree the Ibrox disaster was magic if anyone turns up.

 

Folk doing lines of coke off my coffin.

 

Minister to say Fridge was a fucking ledge but let’s not waste anyone’s time messing about here, we’re all screaming for a pint and some sausage rolls.

 

Who’s that lying at Pittodrie being belted out as folk exit the crem and try to get to the bar fastest.

 

My Mum will be proud.

Can I get an invite, sounds ace.

[Fridge]

All invited

[Red Ram]

I'll be in a cardboard coffin ready for the cremation, maybe a few flowers to cover the cardboard.

Plenty tape on the bottom I hope - nothing worse than the erse falling out of a loaded cardboard box

[tightbreeks]

I'll splash out on industrial strength staples, I'll avoid getting cremated in aberdeen where you might get ashes of a dodgy so and so.

[tiktak]

I don't want anybody spending any money I've left on a loada shite. Coffins and ceremonies and all of that ain't really for me. Prefer to go missing and never be found.

[tightbreeks]

A public disposal in the grass market. Maybe cut me into quarters. Like those ads that make sure your family don't foot the bill, charge 20 quid for each ghoulish bystander.

[muttonhumper]

Shitloads.
 

Religious services always seem to focus too much on the superstition. I came to say goodbye to the deceased not to say hello to fucking Jesus.

 

Not been to a plunting with a shitty religious propaganda bullshit service for years thankfully.

 

Last 15 years ish all humanists, and last one I was at 2 weeks ago, actually had John McRuvie doing the service, and he did a very good job.

 

I genuinely wouldn’t mind nobody turning up. 

 

Surely some folk fae your office would turn up?   


My ain cremation would will have to go with this:
(cheerleaders included)

 

[Henry]

Surely @@Fridge should be cryogenically frozen, rather than buried. 

[muttonhumper]

[Studebaker-90]

Or taken down the recycling centre and left in the appropriate white goods section.

Or flytipped outside greig court

[Parklife]

Or taken down the recycling centre and left in the appropriate white goods section.

Haha

[Fridge]

Pricks

[King Street Loon]

Or taken down the recycling centre and left in the appropriate white goods section.

That's nae bad for you.

[dazzy_deff]

That's nae bad for you.

Besties.

[Poodler]

Or taken down the recycling centre and left in the appropriate white goods section.

 

The death of DWQ has improved your posting!

[King Street Loon]

Thanks son

I'm nae your son.

That patter is just creepy.