Thread O Bloke Shit

[Bluto10]

1996

it wasn’t a question DD min.

[Bluto10]

Machine, shit like that will get you a hiding (especially when you’ve 4 eyes, buck teeth and have your top button undone on your trousers to release the pressure and gelled hair)

A drunk bird said that to me one night walking home from town - I kicked in her two male chaperones. ‘How do you like that? that’s your fault’

Needless to say, she was gobsmacked

only got two eyes

no buck

and I use wax, not gel.

 

yer nae very good at this Chesney.

[Arabian Knight]

auld grey ye shid be oan the new program oan telly- sex tape

http://metro.co.uk/2019/04/26/channel-4s-new-show-sex-tape-9324285/amp/

yersel n brian swap lovers n tak thim tae bed n the ridin gits filmd.. in the morn the fower eh yeez gaither n the livin rim n watch it n talk aboot hings ye notice aboot wit went oan under the soiled sheets

[Arabian Knight]

aye it wid b intrstin mix up like..bluto n ez missus ir bevvy heeds wi nae intrest in material possessions.. brian n his ir the opposite.. aw aboot a shwin aff wealth tae strangers, so ye cin imagine thir'd be friction atween thim like

[DD1903]

it wasn’t a question DD min.

As there was no question mark, I took it to just be a statement that was wrong.

[Bluto10]

Did

Was

Moose

 

contacts.

 

nope, never.

 

told you already; wax

 

 

[Studebaker-90]

Tied a perfect Windsor knot today despite not having worn a tie in over a year. Never leaves yih.

[Poodler]

Hope the locusts are packed well

[BrianFaePerth]

Tied a perfect Windsor knot today despite not having worn a tie in over a year. Never leaves yih.

There must be some sort of racism to do with Erchie in this. @@Police

[Studebaker-90]

Somebody somewhere will be offended

[Poodler]

Somebody somewhere will be offended

Sometimes the claims will be false

[Ke1t]

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=lqD8GEa7aAw

 

Imagine if they tried this today... 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhHq4m_Bi5g

[Studebaker-90]

Sometimes the claims will be false

Hahahahah

[maryhilldon]

Imagine if they tried this today...

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhHq4m_Bi5g

Geordies would be outraged.

[Poodler]

[1903Fitba]

Jesus Christ

[alscotoz]

Jesus Christ

 

 Could be wrong, but I don't think she is.

[Bluto10]

Ferrari chassis

[Redforever86]

Reminds me of my ex.

 

Was that his mum?

[1903Fitba]

Post Op

[manboobs109]

Has she got her tits out on Instagram?

[maryhilldon]

^ Wow!

[Dom Sullivan]

Heres my current squeeze

 

I reckon there’s a cock and balls tucked up there

[Bluto10]

Reminds me of my ex.

whats his name?

[1903Fitba]

Has she got her tits out on Instagram?

Sadly not

[Bluto10]

One up the bum, no harm done

While you’re down there, luv

[Arabian Knight]

coupla mare pics fae early oors eh the morn lest nicht search fir meh brither..nae bin seen since england sweden gemme lest yr..goat telt aff  jakey joe eed exploded efter huffin a can eh swan ges n sperkin up a fag butt..thot it wis a joke..cunts gan up in smoke richt enuf..jist need sumhin tae tell meh faither so ez goat closure thit ez nae gittin ez auldscud mags beck

[Studebaker-90]

One up the bum, no harm done

No, not up the arse.

[Fridge]

I had to walk through Barcelona after the terrorist attack to get a pizza for the kids as had no food in the house. Armed police and a helicopter overhead with a spotlight basically nobody else on the streets.

 

Got a few nods from the coppers at street corners thinking some boy from Aberdeen is unlikely to be a threat. Thought I was the fucking ace (although was shitting it on the underground the next day scoping out anyone who looked dodgy)

[Fridge]

Na, apart from the incident Barcelona is fine. As longs you watch out for pickpockets it’s pretty safe. Just don’t look like a gormless tourist.

 

Used to get the underground home at 2am and there were young folk lassies etc on their own and never saw one bit of hassle.

 

I wouldn’t be getting the tube in London or New York at that time of night.