Coronavirus

[daytripping]

Down to 3 cases in Aberdeen yesterday, 1 in Aberdeenshire. That's lower than before things opened up more, makes you wonder why businesses weren't allowed to open sooner. Clearly makes no difference when you're already at low numbers.

Fuck knows what's happening in Moray, bloody teuchters. 

[manboobs109]

Is there loads of slaughterhouses and shit up there? Seem to get loads in those places

[shut up meg]

2 hours ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Yer man , Soops . 1st vaccine this morning . Nae bother . 

Give it 24 hours, I had the jab at 6pm and slept like a log. Felt great the next day and but woke up the 2nd night at 2am with a high temperature and my arm felt like I'd been kicked by a horse.

The high temperature only lasted a day although the arm was sore for a few days.

[thedandydon]

4 minutes ago, shut up meg said:

Give it 24 hours, I had the jab at 6pm and slept like a log. Felt great the next day and but woke up the 2nd night at 2am with a high temperature and my arm felt like I'd been kicked by a horse.

The high temperature only lasted a day although the arm was sore for a few days.

Aye, had much the same side effects. Took about a day but had the fever and aching muscles for a couple days after and sore arm for another day or two. The wife had her 2nd on the same day and reported nowt but a sore arm.

[Dons79]

2 minutes ago, Sooper-hanz said:

 

Cheers , chaps ??

Same felt like crap the next day sore arm and pretty fatigued. After a couple of days, no problems, apparently you either get it a bit shit the first one or the second but never both. Second one will be a breeze

[Poodler]

Missed my 2nd vaccine dose today. They’d moved it forward from the initial date

 

 

Perth, WA are coming out of their mini lockdown - gatherings at home to be no more than 100 people!!

fa’s holding parties like at!

[Lencarl]

Severe cases of COVID-19 are 2.5 times more likely in men with male-pattern baldness than those retaining a full head of hair, researchers have warned.

Male-pattern baldness — or 'androgenetic alopecia' — is a common, genetically-determined form of hair loss that affects around 50 per cent of men aged over 50.

It commonly presents as a thinning of the hair in the temporal areas of the scalp before advancing to affect the crown as well.

 

 

There you have it.

Potato heads are at most risk.

Probably applies to 90% of posters on here. 

[Zeus]

Pushing door to door testing on Moray. 

Hope the teuchters tell them to poke it.  

[daytripping]

2 hours ago, thedandydon said:

Aye, had much the same side effects. Took about a day but had the fever and aching muscles for a couple days after and sore arm for another day or two. The wife had her 2nd on the same day and reported nowt but a sore arm.

Same symptoms here except my shoulder is still in pain after 3 weeks, not even the jab side. Probably just a strange coincidence and not connected to the vaccine. Finally bit the bullet and have the doctors tomorrow, not been in years. 

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

3 hours ago, manboobs109 said:

Is there loads of slaughterhouses and shit up there? Seem to get loads in those places

Hector Dick's farm is a famous slaughterhouse up that way. 

[Don Fonte]

44 minutes ago, Matt Armstrong's Dog said:

Hector Dick's farm is a famous slaughterhouse up that way. 

Watch it.

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

12 minutes ago, Don Fonte said:

Watch it.

Sorry min. I don't wish to offend anyone or any soul, especially the pigs of Mr Dick.  

[Don Fonte]

Just now, Matt Armstrong's Dog said:

Sorry min. I don't wish to offend anyone or any soul, especially the pigs of Mr Dick.  

She's still alive.

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

2 minutes ago, Don Fonte said:

She's still alive.

Aye, I wouldn't be surprised if she is after all regardless of my tongue-in-cheek humour, Don. Always sceptical when there hasn't been a body found in a case of murder or manslaughter and this case isn't different. 

[Redforever86]

5 minutes ago, Matt Armstrong's Dog said:

Aye, I wouldn't be surprised if she is after all regardless of my tongue-in-cheek humour, Don. Always sceptical when there hasn't been a body found in a case of murder or manslaughter and this case isn't different. 

Probably got sick of him and the kids and fucked off to London. 

Then got killed by a black man. 

[Don Fonte]

2 minutes ago, Redforever86 said:

Probably got sick of him and the kids and fucked off to London. 

Then got killed by a black man. 

After he raped her.

[Don Fonte]

8 minutes ago, Matt Armstrong's Dog said:

Aye, I wouldn't be surprised if she is after all regardless of my tongue-in-cheek humour, Don. Always sceptical when there hasn't been a body found in a case of murder or manslaughter and this case isn't different. 

She was worth a dunt too.

[Redforever86]

Just now, Don Fonte said:

After he raped her.

Before*

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

2 minutes ago, Don Fonte said:

She was worth a dunt too.

She was a bonnie lassie alright. Nice form?.

[manboobs109]

When's bukkake allowed?

[Ke1t]

1 minute ago, manboobs109 said:

When's bukkake allowed?

Between 8pm and 3am Monday to Friday. 

 

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

12 minutes ago, Redforever86 said:

Probably got sick of him and the kids and fucked off to London. 

Then got killed by a black man. 

Could've been a white man or an inbetweener?.

[BrianFaePerth]

12 hours ago, Poodler said:

Missed my 2nd vaccine dose today. They’d moved it forward from the initial date

 

 

Perth, WA are coming out of their mini lockdown - gatherings at home to be no more than 100 people!!

fa’s holding parties like at!

The dear leader, peace be upon him, has said we can go about our business almost like normal. Only 45,000 allowed at the footy though.

[King Street Loon]

16 hours ago, thedandydon said:

Aye, had much the same side effects. Took about a day but had the fever and aching muscles for a couple days after and sore arm for another day or two. The wife had her 2nd on the same day and reported nowt but a sore arm.

Got my jag on Monday and had absolutely no issues after apart from a dull ache in the arm where they injected me.

Moderna was what I got.

[elephantstone78]

On 5/5/2021 at 6:56 AM, Dons79 said:

https://youtu.be/3lvUCAHRa6I
 

always expected the islands to be something like this. Can you confirm henry?.??

Lerwick summer fete 

 

[Ke1t]

On 5/7/2021 at 6:18 AM, Sooper-hanz said:

Almost 24 hours later I’m still fine . Bit of tenderness but nothing else .

I am quite a tough cunt though . 

You think you could batter an ostrich? 

[Fridge]

1 minute ago, Bad_Mobby said:

An emu would be easier 

Wait till Rod is fixing his aerial and then cheap shot him with a pink windmill of punches.

[Ke1t]

2 hours ago, Sooper-hanz said:

Im not sure. Id imagine they have sharp talons and have a great kick.  I wouldn't like to try tbh.

I think ostriches are the line between whether you're handy in a fight or not. 

The wings, and beak, and giant, clawed feet are definitely a concern, but if you can get in close and get a hold of its neck then I think you're going to win that fight. Once you have it on the ground you can choke it or crush it's fucking bird skull. 

Once you've death with an ostrich you can probably handle yourself in  fight with another human or even animals that are considered to be more fierce.  Maybe even one of the smaller primates... immensely strong, and excessively brutal in a fight. 

One popular way to deal with an ostrich is to batter the fuck out of it with a big stick. That's what the experts recommend. But personally I feel like you might as well shoot it from 30 yards if you're going to use weapons. All scenarios I envisage are weaponless encounters, where you have to develop effective strategies rather than just wade in with a baseball bat. 

[Ke1t]

3 minutes ago, Sooper-hanz said:

An ostrich will tear you to pieces with those fucking feet. 

Maybe if you walk up to it dressed like a fucking tourist, a pair of skinny jeans, a cotton t-shirt, and flip flops... and probably one of those metrosexual hairdos that flop over your eyes, obscuring your vision. 

Wear stout boots, a heavy pair of chainsaw cargos, and a good, tactical vest, and you don't have to worry about shit like ostrich claws. 

Smarten up or you're going to get battered by a duck, you soft bastard. 

[Bluto10]

17 minutes ago, Ke1t said:

Maybe if you walk up to it dressed like a fucking tourist, a pair of skinny jeans, a cotton t-shirt, and flip flops... and probably one of those metrosexual hairdos that flop over your eyes, obscuring your vision. 

Wear stout boots, a heavy pair of chainsaw cargos, and a good, tactical vest, and you don't have to worry about shit like ostrich claws. 

Smarten up or you're going to get battered by a duck, you soft bastard. 

no, no.

 

never. ever, ever, ever. ever, wear cargos. ever.