Scottish Elections

[Don Fonte]

6 minutes ago, Bad_Mobby said:

ASDA smart price beans for 17p 

@manboobs109

[caledonia]

Douglas Ross referee, MP, Scottish Tory Leader, and MSP incoming says we should only concentrate on one thing.

The man is a fud

[Parklife]

1 minute ago, caledonia said:

Douglas Ross referee, MP, Scottish Tory Leader, and MSP incoming says we should only concentrate on one thing.

The man is a fud

His inability to concentrate on multiple things at once will be why he struggles so much to make offside calls accurately. 

[Don Fonte]

16 minutes ago, caledonia said:

Douglas Ross referee, MP, Scottish Tory Leader, and MSP incoming says we should only concentrate on one thing.

The man is a fud

I'm sure I've mentioned before how much I despise this man. Well rooted from years ago.

[caledonia]

Clear winner in the Leaders debate was Alex Salmond and he was not even invited.

Also i see they had to switch studios because of an Alba party protest

Not very silent though

[caledonia]

1 hour ago, cheesepipes said:

Starving kids seems to be a discussed big topic these days. 

 

You can pick up a reduced loaf of bread and an almost out of date packet of ham for 50p in most leading supermarkets at 8pm. 

 

Would you send Douglas Ross to Tesco for your messages though even with a note?

[Parklife]

13 minutes ago, cheesepipes said:

Hes got horrible features. 

Aye. Like being a Tory. 

[Parklife]

I was in the BB's just went for the football.

They used to try and get us to do marching and god shit but no one done it and just went and got the ball out. 

The Saturday morning football and occasional tournaments are the only reason anyone went to it & the captains knew it so just let us get on with it. 

 

[sheepcrooky]

16 minutes ago, cheesepipes said:

Ive regaled this story before. 

I was kicked out of scouts for launching a scud missile of a shot directly into the stomach of a pregnant woman. 

Im not a monster, i was aiming it for her husbands face and missed by a few feet. 

And that was the end of my dib dib dibbing. 

Im presuming everything went ok. 

If it was about 51 1/2 years ago, you might have hit it into mummy Sturgeon. You have a lot to answer for. 

[Fridge]

25 minutes ago, cheesepipes said:

Ive regaled this story before. 

I was kicked out of scouts for launching a scud missile of a shot directly into the stomach of a pregnant woman. 

Im not a monster, i was aiming it for her husbands face and missed by a few feet. 

And that was the end of my dib dib dibbing. 

Im presuming everything went ok. 

Are you related to Drew Jarvie? He used to love scudding a ball off a pensioner in the Merkland during the keeper warm up.

Mind some old Codger got one clean off the dish and had to get stretchered out. One of this feel sorry for him moments but also trying not to piss yourself laughing.

 

[Parklife]

1 hour ago, cheesepipes said:

How come if i reference homosexuals regularly im accused of being one. 

Going by your laws of the jungle would this make you a closet Conservative supporter. 

I don't actually think you're gay, Cheesers. It's all in jest. 

You do appear to have quite the fascination with men anally penetrating each other though. I don't find it attractive, it's just confusing. 

[Guest]

5 minutes ago, cheesepipes said:

Its cheap old fashioned humour from an age gone by. 

I simply can't get out of it. My friends are all the same, one in particular most definitely worse. 

Ive even got a poof mate. Although he left for London 2 decades ago for more penis choices. 

Yer poof mate isn't Douglas "I hate pikies" Ross is it?

Granted I hate the Tories with an absolute passion but if I did have a shred of support for them I'd be very worried. What an absolute bell end the Boris puppet is?.

[Guest]

Cheespipes is defo the kind of guy who's tried to stuff his own cock up his arse 

[Guest milne_afc]

2 minutes ago, ConsiCanBoogie1903 said:

Cheespipes is defo the kind of guy who's tried to stuff his own cock up his arse 

You make it sound so unromantic 

[Guest]

Just now, milne_afc said:

You make it sound so unromantic 

Don't imagine he owns any deodorant, let alone scented candles and aromas. 
 

No, he'll be trying to jam it up there dry and unwashed. When he fails he comes on here and talks about cocks and arsed all evening. 
 

It's really sad to see

[Clydeside_Sheep]

Just had an SNP election flyer through the door.

2 words are conspicuous by their absence - "independence" and "referendum".  Neither appears even once ?

Instead they "pledge" to get us through the pandemic and "prioritise" investment in the NHS and education.

They list some threadbare achievements, including "global leadership on climate change" ?

The photo of Sturgeon used must be 5 - 10 years old too.

Great stuff!  To be fair to Sturgeon, she said (years ago) that she would not go for a referendum until Indy support was consistently above 60%, when it has been nowhere near that and is currently falling.

Alba's formal press activities have been cringe-worthy so far, but I do hope Salmond slithers into Holyrood for the laughs.

[Guest]

Just now, cheesepipes said:

Based on what. 

I dont even enjoy a slender lady finger, no matter how much im told to relax. 

Your obsession with cocks and anus' of course 

[Guest]

Just now, Clydeside_Sheep said:

Just had an SNP election flyer through the door.

2 words are conspicuous by their absence - "independence" and "referendum".  Neither appears even once ?

Instead they "pledge" to get us through the pandemic and "prioritise" investment in the NHS and education.

They list some threadbare achievements, including "global leadership on climate change" ?

The photo of Sturgeon used must be 5 - 10 years old too.

Great stuff!  To be fair to Sturgeon, she said (years ago) that she would not go for a referendum until Indy support was consistently above 60%, when it has been nowhere near that and is currently falling.

Alba's formal press activities have been cringe-worthy so far, but I do hope Salmond slithers into Holyrood for the laughs.

Give it a rest you half brained dipshit lunatic

[Guest]

Ever been on question time, @Clydeside_Sheep ?

 

 

[Guest]

12 minutes ago, cheesepipes said:

You dont imagine i own deodorant?

You're a fucking disgrace. 

You're the one who doesn't have deodorant 

[Guest]

11 minutes ago, cheesepipes said:

You're obsessed with black people. 

I dont ruin your good standing on here because of it. 

We both know I don't have a good standing on here. 
 

I have many a hater, it keeps me coming back x

[Don Fonte]

3 minutes ago, ConsiCanBoogie1903 said:

We both know I don't have a good standing on here. 
 

I have many a hater, it keeps me coming back x

I don't think people hate you, they just think you're a prick.

[Guest]

Just now, Don Fonte said:

I don't think people hate you, they just think you're a prick.

Maybe so, maybe so

[Guest]

22 minutes ago, cheesepipes said:

Im very comfortable with my high level hygiene and expensive designer scents. 

Get many a positive comment from female representatives on rigs.  The competition is stinking Africans or Geordie scaffolders but ill always maintain my gold standard. 

Haha. 
 

Heard the scenes are brutal offshore in Africa, so an old school park tells me. 
 

 

[Guest]

25 minutes ago, cheesepipes said:

Man of habit. 

Could be heading out to The Moorings to woo Rock Chicks or running a tool subsea on a rig. 

Dove Deodorant 

Johnsons Baby Lotion for soft skin 

Vanilla n Mango beard oil for the hugely dangerous beard. 

Small spray of Dior Fahrenheit (30 years plus customer) 

Baby talc for my bollocks. 

Dont sit there and tell me thats not a delight for the senses. 

That's a fair bloody set up. 
 

The talc stop the sweats? 
 

Just ordered some Tobacco and Vanilla beard oil myself. 
 

I take back everything I said, a cacophony of delightful smells there 

[Matt Armstrong's Dog]

26 minutes ago, Dad said:

Is that really why he went to London? Cock? 

 

Surely more to it than that cheese son

Dennis Nilsen made a successful career out of moving away from our area to Laaadin in search of same sex loving.

His profession as a civil servant at the Job Centre was just a clever ruse used to put the local police off this upstanding citizen of humanity. It worked to be fair to the loon. 

[maryhilldon]

50 minutes ago, ConsiCanBoogie1903 said:

 

Just ordered some Tobacco and Vanilla beard oil myself. 

Treating your other half? 

[Guest]

4 minutes ago, maryhilldon said:

Treating your other half? 

Probs do the trick on fanny pubes, right enough. 
 

Make it taste a bit better. 

[Don Fonte]

1 hour ago, Dad said:

It's an 'aye' from me ✋

Aye he was on that other thread calling you an arsehole and all sorts. Not surprised you don't like him.

[maryhilldon]

45 minutes ago, ConsiCanBoogie1903 said:

Probs do the trick on fanny pubes, right enough. 
 

Make it taste a bit better. 

Try mayo.